I was thinking this morning how grateful I am for the people in my life that helped me see what I want. That sounds pitiful I know. Who doesn’t know what they want?
I was guided through a thought process that helped me look at what I’ve enjoyed doing all of my life and which talents I have. That doesn’t sound so life changing, does it? But, I was in such a dark place. I kept thinking the same negative thoughts, over and over, and couldn’t find my way out. So for me, it was life changing …..even life saving.
In an effort to get me to focus on something positive, I was given a challenge: to start painting again and to start blogging. I was resistant at first. I hadn’t done any painting for years. I was totally computer illiterate. But over a period of 12 days I was helped to let go of some guilt and encouraged (at first gently and then gradually pretty forcefully) to get out the paints and get the help I needed to overcome the computer problem.
As I began to share my experience with the people in my life, family, neighbors, gym friends, the dry cleaner lady, I was hit with an unexpected response. Many of them looked fine to me, some even happy. But the more we talked, the more they shared, they didn’t know what they wanted. They were busy having kids, raising kids, and working to pay bills and earn a living. They were looking forward to movies and eating out on the weekends and a vacation sometime this year. But, what did they want? I had discovered a cavernous mystery.
Once again I came up against it: we appear on the outside to be very different: but, on the inside we are very much alike.
Mark Twain said: “I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can’t find anybody who can tell me what they want.” I didn’t actually hear him say this, but it is attributed to him on the internet…..so it must be true??? My own small survey does bear out the second part.
Do you ever tell yourself to forget what your parents, your friends, or your spouse wants from you or for you. Forget what you think is expected of you. What do you want? It’s time to take a good look at your life and think about what you want…..what makes you happy. What makes you smile and your whole being light up when you think about it?
What do you want?
And an amen to you, Sherrie! I think we’ve all weened ourselves from wanting what we want so we can stay safe… and satisfied if not happy. Dreaming and planning, they’re muscles and have to be exercised. Thanks for starting the exercise movement!
I love your way with words, Michelle. Thanks