Checking out the new fall TV shows is always fun.  This year, fall 2016, The Good Place is one of the comedies I’m recording. It’s about what life’s like after we die.  How does someone get to go to the good place when the life they lived on earth qualifies them to go to the bad place?  Well…..the myriad of funny situations around this premise make for a lot of fun.  I’m always up for a conversation about good and evil and so I’m enjoying watching and listening to these characters try to sort out their feelings and thoughts on the subject.

I’m especially enjoying the character Jianyu.  He somehow arrived in the good place a drug dealer/dj but was mistaken for a buddhist monk who had taken a vow of silence.  He didn’t correct that assumption by just keeping his mouth shut.  Everyone around him gave him the benefit of the doubt as each new situation arose…..surely, of anyone there, he would take the highest road, think the best thoughts and BE the goodest. With each new situation, he just stood there mute and the others around him voiced the pure, positive expression they expected from him.

I decided this would be an interesting thing for me to try.  I’m so quick to voice my opinions.  Could I keep my mouth shut long enough for those around me to fill in the silence? And if I could, what would they assume I would say?…..ooh…..I shudder to think about it…..but, what an interesting thing to do.

Allowing myself to be silent is presenting me with lots of gifts.  Surprise!  Surprise!  One big one is giving me time to be aware of others emotions rather than their words.  When I’m not thinking about what I’m going to say, I seem to pay more attention to their facial expressions and body language;  I gather more information and low and behold that information is sometimes completely different from what I think I hear in their words.

Another gift I’m realizing gradually is that I feel no pressure to respond…..and in most cases, as others see that I’m not responding, they jump right back in and continue their own conversation.  I can sit back and enjoy myself.  I no longer try to offer sage advice or solutions. The pressure is off!  I like this. This is fun.

As to evolution…..perhaps by listening more and talking less, I can just relax and enjoy others and their differences of opinion. Relaxing and enjoying both sound great…..sort of like being on vacation!